Wednesday, August 29, 2007

SAT Scores and Tattooed Avril Wannabes

The College Board announced a national decline in average SAT scores this week.

I wasn't planing on writing about it, but considering
the discussion of satire around here lately, I thought I'd share this hillarious post by Harvey over at IMAO:

Average scores on the reading and math sections of the SAT test declined slightly this year, indicating that America's teenagers are dumber than ever. This news was greeted by jubilation from Democrats across the country.
Harvey notes House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's statement:

The fact is, Democrats have nothing to offer the average intelligent, self-sufficient person. All we can do is take advantage of drooling idiots who want to put their lives in the hands of the Nanny State. Our only shot at political power is the votes of people who are too dumb to think for themselves. This time, it's the jackpot. Think for themselves? Hell, these pierced & tatted Avril wanna-be's can barely think at all!
Read the whole thing. Pelosi apparently danced a little jig upon hearing the news. Yet, as Harvey explains:

... some people objected to being called "mega-tard-tastic" just because of piss-poor standardized test scores. Miss Teen USA contestant Lauren Upton (Miss South Carolina) explained her point of view.

Lauren Upton, of course, has become famous around the blogosphere with her response to the fact that just 1 in 5 people can find the U.S. on a world map:

I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because…. some.. people out there… in our nation….. don’t have maps and I believe that our education, like such as in South Africa and the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should.. uh….our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S….. er, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future for our children…..

Here's Upton's YouTube:

According to Harvey, upon hearing Upton's answer, Speaker Pelosi danced another jig.

Great stuff!

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